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7 billion people experienced 2015 in a different way. In 2015 I had my worst heartbreak. He was not even mine but I was willing to do almost anything just to see him smile and happy, without expecting anything in return. I was so small in his life while he was really big in mine. I freed my time to talk to him while he talked to me in his free time. 6 months went on and all I had were false hopes.
So in 2015 I learned the next time I fall in love, I will be brave. I will say no when I need to, and I will say yes when I really should. I will walk away when it is hurting me, I will not stay and hurt myself even more.I will destroy you in the most beautiful way possible. And when I leave you will finally understand, why storms are named after people.
We’re not something, but we’re not nothing.
i said this to myself in my head when i was inexcusably drunk one night at a party and saw this guy (of mine?) giving his hands, his heart and his admiration to someone else. i couldn’t be mad because he wasn’t mine, but he also wasn’t hers either (via floricawild)
this is everything
(via se-sso)
The day you left, I realised you were a rogue planet. That you didn’t orbit around anyone or anything. That you had no solar system and you found your way into mine, into my orbit, to stay with me just for a little while. But I couldn’t keep you. You weren’t meant to be a part of me. Our love was like the sun, ninety-nine percent of this solar system, but not nearly enough to keep you. Some things are more beautiful because they don’t belong to anyone or anything. That is how I would like to remember you. As something too wild for me to keep, rather than a thing that threw the sun away.
When I go, bury me with nothing but my own skin. I spent far too many days trying to outrun this thing called mine, so if I set myself into your arms would you hold me like the earth, quietly? I am yours. Give me a field, give me a big sky. A mountain. Give me your mouth. I’m just looking for a quiet place that I could die inside of.
I wish I had met you sooner. If you were mine when I was sixteen I never would’ve fallen for that boy in my chem class and cracked my head open on his chest. I couldn’t see straight for 3 weeks after that. And maybe if I had known you since I was a little girl I never would’ve gotten sad enough to cut myself, a tick mark in my skin for each time my mother cried. And if we had met two summer’s ago I probably would’ve been asleep in your bed instead of in my big sister’s car when she crashed it and I could’ve twirled my fingers around your hair instead of pulling the strings out of hospital blankets. If we had met just a few months sooner I’d probably never know the taste of too many pills because my mouth would be too busy telling you that I love you. I know that people can’t save you, I’m just saying, I think that if we could go back in time, and kiss before the night the fire in my bedroom washed away the blood stains on my carpet, I wouldn’t know what it’s like to mean it when I say I want to die.
You’re not even mine and I can’t stop thinking about how terrified I am of losing you.
Even if it hurts, could you talk about your own darkness first? And please take your time and pour everything out, and when you’re done ask me about mine. I’ll be waiting. After I tell you, let’s stay quiet till we feel both our darkness are in sync. Maybe then, we can finally fall asleep.
If I could slide my hands
through the spaces
between your ribs,slip my fingers past
your heaving lungs
to touch your anxious heart,
would I find that it is mine to hold?
I was so small in your life while you were so big in mine
How cruel, your veins are full of ice-water and mine are boiling.
